Chara Chara
by Erie Maxwell
Summary: A nineteen year old Akane must deal with her sisters leaving, being the youngest of three and a supposed cannabalistic wizard who only goes after young girls. AU based on one of my favorite books - Anyone who guesses correctly gets a cookie!
1. In Which Akane Meets An Entirely Detesti

Chara Chara  
  
By Erie Maxwell  
  
Gah! I accidentally deleted this when I was trying to put up my edited version. Should really pay more attention to what I'm doing, I suppose. *blushes* At least I had it saved!  
  
Here's the meaning of the title, just to explain it a bit more.  
  
CHARA CHARA (sounds like CHAH RAH CHAH RAH.) Slang for something that is too flashy in terms of style, or refers to person who blatantly flirts.  
  
Nice, ne? *laughs* So, onto the story!  
  
* * *  
  
Chapter One: In Which Akane Meets A Thoroughly Detestable Stranger  
  
* * *  
  
Tendo Akane was born in the land of Nermia, where nothing seemed to work the way it was supposed to, except when it was expected to be the opposite of normalcy. Cows lived beneath the sea at night, hiding from the moon; the town was plagued by the efforts of the notorious bone thief, Old Mother Hubbard's alter ego; and the rule of three was switched on its head, much to the irritation of the local royal family. Needless to say, it was not surprising that Akane was rather annoyed by her placement in the family as youngest. She routinely begged her parents to have another child, but to no avail. She was simply told to go to her room and think about what she had just asked, and after months of intense contemplation she realized that she was being just the slightest bit selfish. Therefore, at the age of ten Akane finally decided to accept her fate in this matter, with the clear understanding that she wouldn't in any other.  
  
Akane's older sisters were extremely different from her, even in the blurry years of childhood. Kasumi, the eldest girl (and so, in turn, the one fated to become most successful when she set out to seek her fortune) was a sweet, well-tempered girl. She had lived thirteen years with her mother, a fact which had allowed her to pick up some of the traits she had admired the most while developing her own personality. She was a fantastic chef, a terrific sewer and, although she had the tendency to appear a bit dull-witted at times due to an inborn reluctance to state her opinion, a very bright girl. Nabiki, the middle child, was not content to stick to what she had been told since birth. She was determined to make her way in the world, rule of three or not.  
  
'Besides,' she'd sometimes argue, 'It isn't as if we're living in some fairy tale. This is the modern world! I'm sure that's just superficial nonsense parents can use to keep their children in their power.' She had discovered at a young age that she was extremely apt with numbers and by the age of twelve was already making a killing off of the neighborhood children, making her the richest child in the entire town.  
  
For many years Akane and her sisters lived happily. Their mother died shortly after Akane had her epiphany, but the girls were well taken care of and although they missed their mother dreadfully, they still had a loving father who doted even more upon his daughters now that he realized how easily he could lose them. Every day he walked them to and from school, before bringing them to the shop to watch his work (and perhaps sell a few weapons while they were at it). It was in this way that he came to meet, and eventually fall in love with the girl's teacher Miss Hinako.  
  
Hinako was the terror of the schoolhouse, forcing children to do chores for misbehaving while she did the same things they were being punished for: eating candy during school hours, hiding comics between textbook pages, even playing pranks on unsuspecting 'delinquents'. She was a child's worst nightmare: a bully with actual authority. She entered her relationship with Akane's father the same she would any new escapade; that is, with whole- hearted excitement. As the days became weeks, Hinako seemed to calm down considerably, although she still routinely ate more than her worth in sweets.  
  
Nevertheless, the pair was happily married within half a year, adding a small, but successful dojo onto their weapons shop in order to pay for Hinako's chosen lifestyle.  
  
* * *  
  
A week before her nineteenth birthday, Akane's father died quite suddenly, leaving her and her sisters in the care of their stepmother. The entire family had to scramble around, advertising their small weapons shop and dojo like mad in the hope of bringing in enough extra cash to pay for the funeral expenses. In the end, they managed to scrape together enough for five all-out funerals (mostly due to the charity of their neighbors), and after giving Tendo Soun a good burial began planning quite a few elaborate birthday parties to pay the neighborhood back.  
  
After the first few parties had died down and the evening one was in full swing, Akane slipped out the door as quietly as possible.  
  
"I'm sure it would be all right if I just stepped out for a breath of fresh air." She reasoned. "After all, Kasumi and Nabiki seem to doing quite fine as hostesses, and I won't be gone long enough for anyone to miss me."  
  
Before she could talk herself out of it, Akane set down the familiar streets of her hometown, marveling at how quiet everything was. The entire town was at the dojo, leaving acres of eerie stillness for her to face alone. She smirked at the unspoken challenge the buildings before her seemed to be placing before her and began to run. She was no wimp; she could handle the dark by herself any day! . . . As long as there were no ghosts. As she began to wonder whether it would be better to go back now, not because of any strange supernatural beings which may or may not be floating around of course, but because she had been gone for awhile now, Akane didn't notice she had run into someone until she felt the thud of her body hitting the ground.  
  
The person beneath her groaned as he quickly jumped to his feet, throwing her back down in the process. Turning towards his assailant, the man glowered. "Jeese, why don't 'cha watch where you're - Hello! Are you all right?"  
  
It was the quickest mood swing Akane had ever seen; going from truly put out to what appeared to be an attempt at gallant in seconds flat. Still, she wasn't about to just sit back and put up with being yelled at for no reason, despite who had pushed who down.  
  
"Now look here, I'm sorry you fell but you were just as careless as I was! Seeing as we seem to be the only two around, you must have seen me coming a mile away!"  
  
The man grinned evilly. "Well, I suppose I could have, considering . . ." he shook his head ruefully. "But I'm sorry I yelled. I just didn't notice you were a girl straight off that's all. You know, from a distance you look quite manly!"  
  
She glared icily at him, but quickly smirked in triumph. "So you _did_ see me than!"  
  
Cocking his head to the side, he smiled pleasantly. "What's your name?"  
  
"Don't change the subject sir!"  
  
"Don't call me that, it makes me feel old! I'm Ranma."  
  
"Yes okay, _Ranma_ than. Do you admit you saw me coming?"  
  
"You know, you've got me at a serious disadvantage here, what with you knowing who I am and me not knowing you. Come on, what's your name?"  
  
"What -is- this? First you insult me, now you've suddenly got to know what I'm called?"  
  
He smiled again, brighter by the minute. "No, I just want to know your name! You know, it's rude not to introduce yourself to someone who you've talked to for so long!"  
  
"Yes, well it's also rude not to answer someone's questions when you're repeatedly asked!"  
  
"Now who would do -that-?"  
  
" . . . Admit you saw me!"  
  
"After you tell me your name." He smirked.  
  
She sighed, growing more than a little agitated with her trailing 'victim'. "Fine, I'm Akane."  
  
Ranma grinned at her, looking like he thought he was the victor. "Nice to meet 'cha Akane." He said, and then began strolling away from her.  
  
It took her a second to wipe the victorious smile off her face and realize she'd been had. "Hey you jerk, come back! Cheat! Liar! All I asked was a simple question!" She tore down the street towards him at breakneck speed, stopping a few yards ahead. "Now, -admit it-."  
  
"Wow, you're pretty fast! Do you wanna be an athlete or a knight or something?"  
  
She glared in response.  
  
" 'Cause you know, you might make it! You'd just have to work on the finer points, like your war with balance!"  
  
Akane took a deep breath, trying to keep herself calm as she repeated 'I'm not gonna retort, all he wants is to get me confused. I'll just stick to my question.' ". . . What's your- Argh!" She sneered at Ranma, repressing the homicidal urges rising inside her.  
  
Ranma smirked at her slip, but was stopped from commenting when a large piece of parchment nailed to a nearby tree caught his eye. He looked strangely proud, but after stealing several shifty glances Akane's way, he molded his face into an obvious mask of calmness.  
  
Rolling her eyes, Akane went to see what he was so worked up about. Pushing Ranma out of the way a tad rougher than necessary, she read:  
  
'Attention All Young Maidens: This is a public warning against the fearful Wizard Onnatarashi Rankou, thief of hearts and devourer of souls. It is advised that all-female citizens between the Ages of 14-28 be assigned a curfew of no Later than 9 o'clock p.m. If you have any information on this detestable villain, Please alert your nearest law office.'  
  
She frowned and turned towards Ranma. "I've heard of him! They say he stuffs each heart to keep as a trophy."  
  
"What? Who says -that-? It's ridicul- I mean yes, yes, it's all true! Disgusting stuff, hmm?" He laughed nervously, avoiding Akane's eyes.  
  
She nodded, a bit excited. "So you know him? I mean, if you know the rumors are all true . . . "  
  
"Y-yeah! We're like this." Ranma crossed his fingers and held them up for Akane to see.  
  
She stared at him, disbelieving. "Really? Than what is he like?"  
  
Ignoring her question, he studied the sign carefully before shaking his head in disgust. "-Onnatarashi-?" He groaned. "Honestly, I ask Ryoga for _one_ favor . . ."  
  
She looked at him levelly and was about to demand an explanation when she finally noticed how long she had been gone. "Oh! It must be near eleven!"  
  
"Don't worry! I swear on . . . mine? Thine? That doesn't sound right . . . Well, I swear as long as I'm here Rankou won't come anywhere near you." He nodded, still puzzling over the question of honor.  
  
She scoffed. "How sweet. However, I meant I've got to get home, it's my eighth birthday party today. I only meant to step out for a moment. Besides, I can take care of myself quite fine, thank you very much!" Akane added quickly.  
  
"Wow, you're already eight? Impressive, I woulda taken you for two." He was rewarded with a parting 'Be-da!' as Akane walked off. He grinned in response, shouting out to her retreating form, "I'd offer to walk you home, but you seem to think you can handle the dreaded 'Onnatarashi' by yourself, right?"  
  
"You got it!" She told him without turning around. She had only gotten a few steps before Ranma popped up beside her. "What do you want _now_? I thought you said I could handle the wizard myself?!"  
  
"I said -you- thought you could, which you're wrong about. He's far too much of a threat for a girl to deal with, even one like you Tomboy!"  
  
Akane scowled at her escort. "What makes you think I'm a tomboy?"  
  
A small smirk danced across Ranma's face. "I already told you, you really don't have the figure of a normal girl, nor the temperament. So, where do you live?"  
  
"What? What's wrong with my 'temperament', hmm?"  
  
"This really is a nice little town. I oughta come down here more often; I never realized how interesting it is. What's your house like?"  
  
"You didn't answer my question!"  
  
"And you didn't answer mine, which is much more immediate."  
  
"Hmph, 'where do I live?' Where do _you_ live?"  
  
"So how old are you, really?"  
  
". . . Oh no, I'm not playing this game again! I can get home quite fine by myself from here, just go."  
  
"So you live close by, do you?"  
  
"Yeah, sure. It's just around the corner."  
  
He seemed to ponder this for a moment. "Well, all right, suit yourself. Bye!" He took off as quickly as he had reappeared and was out of Akane's sight in seconds flat. She sighed happily, finally rid of the night's annoyance and well on her way home. It was then that she noticed that she was in the most remote section of town, which hadn't been completely built up yet.  
  
". . . I'm going to kill him. Really, if I ever meet that jerk again, I'll kill him!"  
  
* * *  
  
A/N: Well? What do you think? I really haven't had this much fun writing a fic in quite a while.  
  
Oh, and translations of a few of the words:  
  
Onnatarashi - Ladies' man, playboy, you get the picture ^-^  
  
I used Rankou instead of Ranko because the former is unisex, while the latter is feminine.  
  
'Be-da!' is the sound made when performing akanbe (Pulling an eyelid down and sticking out your tongue. If you have no clue what I'm talking about, you obviously haven't watched much anime).  
  
I'm still fixing it up, but I believe it's getting there. I'll put up chapter two once it's rewritten.  
  
-Erie 


	2. In Which Akane Recieves A Nasty Shock

Chara Chara  
  
Cookies all around! I'll get to work on the descriptions as quickly as I can. For now, here's chapter two.  
  
* * *  
  
In Which Akane Recieves A Nasty Shock  
  
* * *  
  
Akane could not sew. There was no reasoning to this, as her mother had been a genius with a needle and thread, and had transferred much of this skill onto Kasumi, her oldest. Even Nabiki could patch up her clothes if they chanced to tear, although she was much more likely to buy new ones than wear patched up clothes. Nevertheless, Akane simply could not, though not from a lack of trying.  
  
She was once handed over to a shriveled little gnome by the name of Rumpulstilskin, in hopes that if she could learn to weave straw into gold, a simple ripped shirt would be child's play. The terms were drawn up, and Akane would most certainly have lost her first three born children, had it not been for the marvelous skill only she possessed to turn straw into coal. By the time Master Rumpulstilskin had officially branded her unteachable, she had managed to supply most of the locals with enough fuel for many winters over, not to mention the large amount left for her own family's use. And the fiasco with the star queen was better left forgotten.  
  
The woman, as sweet as she seemed, had been driven mad by years of silence and servitude, only to nearly be burned at the stake by her husband. She evidently believed that only those with the 'magic mark' could even dare touch starflowers, and so before each lesson Akane was forced to draw a star upon her forehead using honey. It was sticky and attracted all sorts of wildlife on the walk back home, but Akane's father was so convinced that this was Akane's only hope that he turned a blind eye to her numerous baths and talked away the short haircut. The flowers themselves hurt quite a bit, which was really the thing that marveled Akane the most.  
  
Here was this queen, glamorous if nothing else, and yet all she seemed to do, the activity she ignored her children for, was teaching children to pick barbed leaves off of plants and weave them into terribly uncomfortable shirts. She began to observe the queen for signs of what NOT to become in life. Not that she had very long to do so, as within the short period of a little over a month, Akane had managed to bring her bizarre teacher to near tears with her many attempts at clothing, all of which she improvised on somewhere halfway through the planning stage. As a result, Akane had made the strangest looking shirts in the entire class. No matter how prickly the shirts may have supposed to be, Akane's were the only ones that pierced, an even more horrible fate when it was taken into consideration that half of the initial shirts had been made into body suits, according to whatever her imagination could create. Nevertheless, Akane did learn that she truly never wished to become ruler of any country, as it apparently drove you insane. The same went for the more ladylike of behaviors, although she always secretly wished to cook, and strangely kept up the need to repair clothes, even if she only improved slightly as the years went by.  
  
She could, however, fight. Since she was old enough to walk Akane had wandered around the store, playing dress-up with her father's old discarded gi and imitating the students as they came in and out of her life. It was one of the biggest pieces of her life she found lacking whenever she was sent off to become a lady. She learned as best she could without formal training, so well in fact that her father decided to make her the heir instead of the older two, both who had shown little interest in continuing the business, due in part to their own dreams. Of course, it didn't hurt that they just didn't see the point to all of it.  
  
This was fine as far as Akane was concerned. Her sisters could go off seeking their fortunes all they wanted, she was fine here. Besides, there would be no point if she did try. She _was_ the youngest after all.  
  
Akane had been nineteen for a little over a month when Hinako called an urgent family meeting in the kitchen. Grumbling silently, the girls followed her in and waited silently, wondering what all this was about.  
  
Taking a deep breath, Hinako glanced them over, looking as if she was considering something. Shaking her for once adult head, she began. "Girls, I have some bad news: We're broke."  
  
The sisters blinked, quite surprised at this sudden revelation.  
  
"Bu-but we were fine last month!"  
  
"Yeah, I know for a fact we had more than enough to survive at least a few months not three weeks ago!"  
  
Hinako smiled nervously and said far too quickly for any of their liking, "Right, well that was then, this is now; let's just concentrate on the future and let it go! No need to worry ourselves over how we got ourselves into this, fretting only causes wrinkles. Heh . . . heh?"  
  
Akane saw Nabiki give their stepmother a strange look, almost as if she appraising her for sale. "Spill it, what happened to the money?"  
  
" . . . But it was so CUTE!" Hinako howled, her voice wavering as she quite visibly broke down, shrinking into her prepubescent body. "And I needed them to complete my collection! Really girls, it was all very necessary."  
  
She was given only glares as a response. "Oh come on, I'll even share them if you guys want! At least for as long as you're still around here."  
  
"Look, you can't bribe us with dolls and toys anymore, we aren't- What?" Akane cooled considerably as she speculated what exactly Hinako was planning. She had never seemed the evil stepmother type; in fact aside from occasionally fighting with them over toys when the girls were younger she had been quite sweet, even motherly. 'Still,' Akane contemplated to herself, 'You can never tell with these things. She could have just been putting up an act all these years, after all.' She looked worriedly down at the child, hoping that her thoughts were completely off.  
  
"That's why I called you in here!" Hinako brightened, obviously happy the conversation had strayed from her spending habits. "Since I really don't think the budget here can support all four of us for very long, I've found apprenticeships for you girls." Removing a large sheet of paper from her pocket where it had been sticking out ever since she had changed, she unfolded it and scanned over it before turning to the least problematic of the three. "Kasumi, I thought you could go to an old friend of mine, Ms. Ackerton. She's fairly nice, but more importantly she can teach you the basics of magic and all that! Than, when you're ready to go off exploring, you'll be fully prepared. Isn't that great?" She beamed up at the twenty-two year old.  
  
Kasumi looked as if she was going to say otherwise, but instead sighed. "Yes, that was very nice of her. And of course I'm pleased with your choice of professions for me, how very clever. Thank you stepmother."  
  
Hinako, taking the words at face value simply nodded, smiled and moved on. "All right, Nabiki. I've got you down for Walnuts, okay? Now before you give me a lecture about how you aren't really the sweets type, you know perfectly well you won't be there very long, and I'm sure you can manage for a little while. Besides, what better place to meet someone? You'll know his secret indulgences before you even exchange names!"  
  
Nabiki merely smirked as she considered it. "Well all right, why not? I'm sure it'll be . . . beneficial."  
  
At that point Hinako finally turned to Akane who was a bit worried now. After all, the other two must have been easy to place, they had actual practical SKILLS. What was she supposed to do, she could write, do math in her head, knew a bit about the world's affairs and was fairly well read, but so what? Almost every other person in Nermia had these skills, at least the ones who had gone to school did! What chance would she stand in the world if all she could do was fight? . . . Unless she became a -knight-. Why that was it! Akane crossed her fingers, wishing as hard as she could to be sent out as a squire.  
  
"Well Akane, I'm sure the two of us will be just fine, right?"  
  
"Huh?!"  
  
Hinako looked at her funnily. "The shop, Akane. You, me, a fairly large amount of sharp metal. Are you okay?"  
  
It took a second for it all to seep in, but she finally got it. Hinako wasn't getting rid of her; she was still the heir here. Trying not to grin _too_ widely, she nodded. "Oh sure, sorry. We'll be fine here!" She sighed happily and turned towards he sisters, only to be hit by a wave of remorse.  
  
It had finally caught up with her that for the first time she wouldn't be sharing the house with her siblings. As much as they had fought over the years, the two had been Akane's best friends. Still, she had known for quite some time that this day was coming, when the other two went off to seek their fortunes while she stayed at home. She wouldn't cry. Warriors never did, so the same must go for those who would one day train them. Blinking off the tiny drops of water threatening to blur her eyes, Akane got up and hugged her sisters in congratulations, telling herself they still had a little while left before being shipped off.  
  
* * *  
  
It turned out to be only a few days, just enough time to help pack. By Tuesday night, Kasumi had been whisked off in a strange pumpkin-shaped golden carriage, a bit worn but still absolutely lovely; and early Friday morning Nabiki set off for the bakery with a slightly sleepy Akane grumbling behind her wordlessly with her trunks. She was already forgetting what exactly she would miss about her sister.  
  
When she got finally got back, Akane was put immediately to work cleaning up the dojo while Hinako straightened up the shop. "After all," Akane was told, "We need to get the place clean if we ever plan to attract customers!" As she could see the sense in this, Akane worked maniacally, stopping only when Hinako came in and exclaimed that she would wear the floor down if she shined it anymore. Of course, a passing noodle cart soon distracted her, but Akane got her initial point and left the wooden boards to arrange the large array of cinder blocks. When it seemed almost right to her, Akane began pacing, wondering when her new students were due to arrive. After waiting for most of the day in nervous anticipation, it became clear that no one was coming.  
  
"Where _are_ they? I thought we had whole books full to the brim of waiting lists? I thought we were so horribly overbooked, we were accepting bribes? I thought we actually HAD students?"  
  
Hinako sighed. "Well honestly Akane, to put it plainly: they quit."  
  
"-What-? Why? Dad was a great teacher!" She frowned, trying to remember if she had insulted the students last time they were here.  
  
Meanwhile, Hinako was idly playing with a twist tie, knowing perfectly well this wasn't going to be pretty. "Oh, he was! It's just, uh . . . well, theydon'tthinkyoucanteachthem."  
  
"_EXCUSE_ me?"  
  
"Akane, think about it! Neither of us are really trained enough to teach very much. Those boys are ahead of you right now, and there's no way I'm giving away my secret!"  
  
"But-." Akane started, only to be interrupted by a small, sticky fist coming over her mouth.  
  
"No 'buts', we're going to add onto the store, make it more of a clothing section!" Seeing Akane's face, she softened a little. "Cheer up, we'll sell gi's too, just for you! Come on, you can go buy us some ice cream and we'll take the night off. Tomorrow you can help me choose the new employees, okay?"  
  
Without waiting for an answer, Hinako dragged Akane towards the house and out the door.  
  
* * *  
  
A/N: *grins madly* So, what did you think?  
  
Ah yes, I need another beta reader. Mine's great, but really quite busy with her own life right now, so I'd love anyone. If you'd like the job, e-mail me at any of my three addresses provided here: babygirl_1999bc@yahoo.com , or erie2222@hotmail.com  
  
Thank you guys!  
  
'Til next chapter,  
  
-Erie 


End file.
